Yep. I actually sent the message that I would enjoy spanking my kid! How sad!!! How is it that when I feel like the sayings and responses taught to me in the Love and Logic curriculum are second nature, there ALWAYS arises a moment to show me that somewhere in there is a cranky...terrible mother--not exactly the model I want my kids to follow.
What can kids learn when we crack? Well, there are two scenarios. We can crack and pretend that never happened (and usually this leads to continual cracking) or we can crack and then mend. We always have a choice. The good news is I can ALWAYS apologize for the times when Mr. Hyde (or in my case, Mrs.) makes an appearance.
"Remember when I told you that I would be happy to spank you? It's not true. I would feel very bad. I'm so sorry for saying that to you. Can you forgive me?"
"Yes Mama. Let's try again."
Ah, yes. Let's try this again.
There Mrs. Hyde...back in your closet.
Ah, I love this. And I need this. Well, I need to mend. Thanks for the reminder.
ReplyDeletei'm liking this blog, miss pamela! and could use some parenting tips from you, i so wish i could come to your classes! i have to be honest, i read the book & really liked its teachings, and started implementing a lot of what it taught into my parenting.
ReplyDeletethen i got a bad taste in my mouth because one of my friends lived by it and i have to say, they were some of the WORST-behaved kids i had ever been around. they were several years older than my son and i kind of looked at them & thought, "if that's what he's going to turn out like, then no thank you!"
so i think what i'm saying here is, i have some questions for you to help me work out. i definitely believe in a lot of L & L's teachings, just trying to find a balance with it. i can explain more in person. :)
I would love to chat with you about it! I don't have all the answers, but I do have access to the authors, so yes. Let's talk! I know that a lot of people will read Love and Logic and then use it to manipulate the kids...without actually using much love or logic. I feel like it is a new way of thinking that takes a lot of study and repetition to really get what the authors are teaching.
ReplyDeleteSo I checked out the book from the library and read it the other day. So far I'm mostly in love. My stubborn daughter and I are enjoying each others company again. How did you get started on this path? I'm still trying to figure out how to make this work long term but right now I am loving it.
ReplyDeleteKatie, if you love it, keep reading or listening to anything you can find on it. That will help you long term. Really, you pick up new things each time while also re-energizing yourself in your technique and ideas. By the way, I hope to be to the Orchard ward in a few Sundays :)
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